Category: TWE

Conan

In the next few years, the federal government is planning to forgive $100 billion of student debt. So, congratulations to six USC grads.

Two Connecticut residents stole over $1,000 worth of candles from the Yankee Candle Village. The suspects are being described as white.… Read the rest

Trump and Mitt Romney were spotted having dinner here New York last night, and everyone’s talking about Romney’s expression. It got even worse when the spaghetti came and Trump said, “Ever see ‘Lady and the Tramp’?” Fallon … Read the rest

Fallon

Taco Bell just opened a new restaurant on the Las Vegas strip that has a VIP lounge, serves alcohol, and has a DJ booth. They were going to add a wedding chapel, but they figured people can only make so many bad decisions in one night.… Read the rest

Fallon

One of the big stories about the Cubs is the so-called “Curse of the Billy Goat,” which occurred back in the ’40s when they turned a fan and his pet goat away because goats aren’t allowed in the ballpark. Or as hot dog vendors put it, “That’s what YOU think.”… Read the rest

Kimmel 

The TSA is cracking down on the so-called comfort animals, the ones people bring on the plane because they claim to be too nervous to fly alone. It can be any kind of pet: birds, monkeys, pigs, turkeys. Someone brought an alpaca on the plane. All you need is a note from a joke online doctor. You pay $75 and your pet is officially a comfort animal. It’s easier to get a horse on a plane than it is to get a bottle of mouthwash on a plane.… Read the rest

A man in Rhode Island just grew the largest pumpkin in North America, weighing over 2,200 pounds. The only downside is, the man’s wife no longer thinks it’s cute when he calls her “pumpkin.” Fallon… Read the rest

Fallon

ABC News just reported that 95 percent of all campaign ads from now until Election Day will be for Hillary Clinton. She’s in 95 percent of the commercials. Even Peyton Manning was like, “Geez, lady, enough is enough.”… Read the rest