Thursday Miscellany

If you think Prince's phallic shadow at the Super Bowl halftime show was coincidental, you didn't listen to much Prince back in the 1980s. I find if funny, in the sense that the whole halftime show is a farce and Prince was simply playing along. The Super Bowl oughtta just bag the "Super Halftime Show" and bring in a marching band from a local high school, but I suspect they enjoy the controversy.

Lesbians kiss on dance floor. It's in New Zealand, not San Francisco. Bouncer drops f bomb and kicks them out. I have a new hero.

Male sweat turns on women, according to scientific research. I've declined to shower for the past two days in hopes of appealing to my wife. Unfortunately, my wife has no respect for science, but she does own a taser.

Hide your money from burglars. Some good common sense advice. I prefer the buckshot-in-the-burglar's-chest approach, but a person doesn't normally get that much good luck.

What are chances your marriage will last? Click here and find out. Warning: It's flawed. My marriage has a 104% chance of lasting 25 years.

The NBA has its first public homo. I figure it won't be long until Sean Salisbury at ESPN and Rick Reilly from Sports Illustrated are drooling praise for his "courage" and spewing venom at anyone who's freaked out. Salisbury, of course, digs perversion, as the recipients of cell phone pictures of his unsheathed sword will attest.

Related: I found this interesting:

Amaechi become the sixth professional male athlete from one of the four major American sports (NBA, MLB, NFL, NHL) to publicly discuss his homosexuality.

What does "to discuss" mean? To disclose? To de-closet? Regardless, if only six guyls have come out, it would appear that professional sports is no place for queeridity. I guess I'll start watching even more sports.

In case you don't have a life: Cheese lovers can now watch cheddar mature 24 hours a day on the Internet.