The Bogus Teetotalling Movement is About to Get Turbo-Charged
Big Pharma is Going Psychedelic
I'm tired of seeing California Sober merit badges, especially on 70-year-old men who are too stoned to drive faster than 20 mph in a 30 mph zone. I passed one of them on the left yesterday, nearly wrecking my car. It's hard to wave two middle fingers and negotiate a narrow school zone.
But maybe I should've held back some of that ire. If you unleash all your drones on something relatively harmless, you'll have nothing left for something truly terrifying.
Like Big Pharma hijacking the neo-psychedelic movement. I've been considering micro-dosing for a few years, but I wanted to find an orthodox Catholic priest with just enough voodoo adventurism to approve it. After imploring priests, and getting ejected from more confessionals than a homeless dude looking for a place to defecate, I gave up.
And now Big Pharma is coming in, hellbent to statin-ize the entire thing. We're probably a long way– November, at least--from getting micro-doses of LSD in our water systems, but I'm sure it's coming.
First, those smoking hot pharma reps will blow doctors away with the (financial) benefits of MDMA, and the stuff will start flying out of pharmacies like Sudafed after trailer-trash rednecks break into Walgreens at 3:00 AM. Then we'll get the flurry of commercials, showing people walking with their faces tilted toward the sun, enjoying the effects of synthetic psilocybin. Then maybe commercials for the benefits of combining psychedelic and dysfunction medications, featuring coysome older couples grinning and fawning because they're Aldousing and the guy got turgid. Eventually, the rest of us feel like dupes for being flaccid and sober, then everyone will be micro-dosing with prescriptions that are easier to get than hookers in Tijuana on Saturday night.
The road to hell used to be paved with good intentions. Those were the halcyon days of FDR and LBJ and their massive federal programs that consolidated power, wealth, the best cocaine, and hottest hookers in our nation's capital, but arguably, they acted with good intentions.
Those days are over. The road has been paved. And we're all being pushed along it, zombie-like, by Big Pharma.
Jules Evans