Leno
I voted for Bush twice, but Leno slayed me with this one: "Mexican President
Vicente Fox announced that they have discovered oil under the Gulf of Mexico. In
a related story, President Bush accused Mexico of having weapons of mass
destruction."
Just Kidding!
> Two masked robbers tried to hold up a cashless credit union bank at gunpoint in
California.
> They burst into the 'bank' at Benicia with weapons drawn and shouted at
employees to hand over the money, reports the San Francisco Chronicle. . . .
> The robbers apparently had no
"Another One-Finger Catch!"
> The Tennessee Titans general manager trumpeted his new free-agent acquisition,
wide receiver David Givens, as a remarkable talent with “more Super Bowl rings
than he's got fingers for”!
> Givens has two rings.
Link [http://suicideofthewest.com/?p=194].
The Bird Can be Profitable
Can you flip off a public worker, get citationed, and then sue under the 14th
amendment and win? Apparently so [http://post-gazette.com/pg/06073/669903.stm].
Cocky Counterfeiter . . . But Not Too Bright
Fire up the ethnic joke machines:
> The counterfeit money looked good, but there was one flaw. There's no such thing
as a one billion dollar bill.
> U.S. Customs agents in California said on Tuesday they had found 250 bogus
billion dollar bills while investigating a
Misc. Leno
From last Friday night:
> I read some sour grapes about the Oscars today. It seems a writer for "Brokeback
Mountain” told the Los Angeles times that he thinks "Crash” only won because
it was set in Los Angeles where academy voters live and can identify with it
Misc. Leno
I'll give Leno's monologue from Monday night the final say in the Brokeback
affair:
> Real shocker last night was that "Crash” upset "Brokeback Mountain” to win
best picture. They were not happy in West Hollywood. They were looting pottery
barns, flipping over Volvos,
Cutting Edge
As we increase our mind-numb attitude toward death, maybe some day the farmer
will be considered a pioneer among morticians:
> A German farmer confessed to feeding the corpse of an elderly family friend to
his pigs and then stealing from his bank account, police said on Monday.
> Police
Get Cancer by Just Living Next Door
The largest full-pack cigarette collection in the world [http://tttt.ru/].
Karate Mom
Heart-warming story? A Columbine averted? Or just a sad story about one pathetic
22-year-old "man"? (Hint: It's not the first two.)
> A middle-aged Russian mum has become a black belt in karate to protect her
22-year-old son from bullies.
> Valentina Ivanova, 50, felt forced