Leno on Gas Prices
California now has the most expensive gas prices. Gas is so expensive now that
drivers are shooting themselves instead of each other.
It's affecting a lot of people. You just wait for the Indy 200 at the end of the
month.
Friday Humor
Some bad ones to use at the bar tonight:
A man walks into a bar holding a slab of asphalt and says, "A beer please, and
one for the road."
A neutron walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "For you, no
You Want Embalming Fluid with That?
> [A] Domino's delivery man used a car to transport corpses to funeral parlors
when he wasn't using the vehicle to bring pies and Cheesy Bread to pizza
enthusiasts [http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0427061pizza1.html].
Also:
That's one way to keep the recidivism
Naked Chimney Sweep
What was your first hint?
> A man who spent five hours naked and stuck in the chimney of his stepmother's
home was arrested on suspicion of being under the influence of drugs, police
said [http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/04/24/D8H6L8TO0.html].
A Hobo Grill
Is that one of those fancy stainless steel ones?
Israeli Anti-Semites
If you missed this
[http://service.spiegel.de/cache/international/0,1518,412390,00.html] last
Friday:
> Following the outrage over the Muhammad caricatures published in Western
newspapers, Israeli artists staged a contest. They were looking for the best
anti-Semitic cartoons. The results are in.
There are some pretty
Babes without Teeth
NASCAR Extends Brand With Bikinis
[http://www.adrants.com/2006/04/nascar-extends-brand-with-bikinis-clothin.php].
Living at the Wal
Funny guy:
> Skyler Bartels kept looking over his shoulder. It's a habit he picked up living
at the Windsor Heights Wal-Mart for three days.
> Really living there. Eating, sleeping, checking out the DVDs, never leaving. The
plan was to spend his entire spring break there. Under
Worse Than Its Bite
> The Bruintjes family says a city inspector was barking up the wrong tree when he
handed them an euro80 (US$97) bill for the Dutch dog tax.
> The family insists it does not have a dog - only a barking doorbell.
> It was the second year in
They're Crushing My Beds
> A hotel in Germany has started charging its guests by the pound for an overnight
stay, according to a Local 6 News report.
> The hotel owner in the town of Norden, Juergen Heckrodt, said he was continually
getting overweight guests, so he decided to make them step on