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Leno on the DNC: "At the Democratic Convention in Denver, both Bill and Hillary Clinton will be speaking . . . not to each other, of course . . ."

Letterman: "Joe Biden is Barack Obama's running mate. Nothing says change like a guy who's been in the Senate for 35 years."

O'Brien: "This week, Barack Obama is going to give his acceptance speech, and reportedly, it will include performances by Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen . . . and they say Obama isn't black enough."

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