When I was visiting Westfield Monastery, I told Sister that prostitution is a lot like an addiction. And like many addictions, the struggle to not slide back into that addiction when things in life get rough is an on-going battle. Even now it is something I struggle with as the days pass and I'm still not working, and the University folk can't get their act together and get things up and running for this degree I was supposed to start working on this week. I could log onto Craig's List this minute and be turning tricks in an hour if I slipped and “took that first drink” as the metaphor goes. The only thing that keeps me on the straight and narrow is going to Confession and confessing the temptation. But there is a certain grace here as well, because it is in these moments of weakness that I am reminded once again that God uses his servants to give me strength. Each time I face a priest in the confessional and bring up the topic of prostitution, I brace myself for the condemnation. I'm still waiting though. The only thing I've received is love, empathy and compassion, things I find I'm completely unable to brace myself for and so they end up breaking me apart in ways that I cannot predict.
That's from Video meliora, who has a great assortment of blog readings at this link. The whole idea of prostitution has always shocked me, both the ladies who "do it" for money and the skanky guys who pay them. It's never been a tempation for me. Indeed, it has always repulsed me . . . and it's not because I'm so devilishly good-looking that I don't need to pay for sex.
