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# Tuesday
- URL: https://thedailyeudemon.com/22289/
- Published: 2011-12-06T06:17:36.000Z
- Updated: 2011-12-06T06:17:36.000Z
- Author: Eric Scheske
- Tags: Miscellaneous, #wpChunk

![Email pic](https://storage.ghost.io/c/ea/fd/eafdb338-c9b6-4f87-8363-78ab94cc3a18/content/images/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Email-pic.jpg "Email pic")

Received in an Email

A well-turned simile is a work of art. A poor simile is, well, pretty funny. [Here's a list of 56 similes that were supposedly written by high schoolers](http://bethanyamandamiller.wordpress.com/2011/02/22/the-56-bestworst-analogies-written-by-high-school-students/?ref=thedailyeudemon.com). I suspect a few of them are fake, but they're all good. A few samples:

"He was as tall as a 6”²3”³ tree." **TDE comment: Why leave any room for doubt?**

"The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant." **TDE comment: Fake, or written by a student with a sense of humor.**

"The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM." **TDE comment: Written like a true Occupy type.**

"McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup." **TDE comment: Not bad, but perhaps a bit too vivid for popular consumption (the simile, not the soup).**

"Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do." **TDE comment: Accurate enough, I suppose. But "wont"?**

"The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while." **TDE comment: I think this is an example of a simile circling back on itself.**

"It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools." **TDE comment: Why is this funny? Don't be so judgmental about other families' pastimes. Maybe call social services, but don't be so judgmental.**

"It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before." **TDE comment: Might be accurate. If a tree falls in a forest . . .**

Drinking Corner

Someone would should have thought of this a long time ago: [translating beer tastes into wine recommendations](http://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/moslive/article-2062747/OLLY-SMITH-A-pint-pot-salute-wine-beer-lovers.html?ref=thedailyeudemon.com). Sample: "If you're a fan of fragrant summer ales or the aromatic seduction of Belgian white beers, look for mildly aromatic grape varieties such as Spanish Albariño, apricot-like Viognier or even Argentinian Torrontés for a full-on lemon-elderflower assault." The language is a bit too flowery for me (or any non-female human), but the concept is good.