The Gospel Music Channel is starting its own American Idol show. It's called Gospel Idol 2005. We're not making this up, and we're not making up this interview with the host:
How will the show compare with "American Idol"?
I love "American Idol." I watch it religiously. There will be some elements that are the same. Ryan Seacrest is cool, but he's not a comedian. I thought if I had the opportunity to be the host, I'd definitely add some edge to it. So if somebody's really bad, I, as the comedian-host, will quickly turn them over to ushering duty at their church or some other office where they won't be singing.
So you'll be the show's version of Simon Cowell?
No. "American Idol" has Simon. "Gospel Dream" has Satan.
Satan? In what form will he appear?
You'll see Satan in the contestants who just shouldn't be there. If someone comes out adorned à la Beyoncé, she's probably on the wrong show. The people who think they're gospel singers, trying to be something they aren't, that's Satan sneaking in.
Link.
This doesn't make sense at a lot of levels. First, there's the combination of fame frenzy with the humility required by the gospels. Then there's the host who demonizes Simon Cowell, presumably for being cuttingly truthful to contestants, but the gospel host will ask contestants to stop singing gospel songs forever. The host apparently thinks American Idol is Satan's playground, yet he watches it "religiously."
Perhaps the host was just trying to be funny. It's hard to say.
